ron weasley > red hair > ronald mcdonaldthis is all very boring, what's coming up:
hi. lolol smalls. anyway, I'm glad I'm leaving. I feel like there's no pressure about anything right now. There is, [cleaning, moving, finance things, friends, general rules] but I don't feel it. that's not really good, but whatever. I'm thinking about a lot of possibilities at the moment that will probably leave me totally screwed [!] once I get out of college [which is still a longish time away]. am I supposed to be looking at universities right now or something? I guess my priorities are out of order. it's okay.
I think I'm getting carpal tunnel! [< not a big revelation]. you know what was scary? my 16th birthday when we went to ny. it was deer-in-the-headlights bad, full of anxiety weirdness. [I need some outside opinions. ...erin?]
now that it's summer, i've been having ridiculously long dreams. they're all really interesting too, at least to me. people i know are showing up consantly. that's new. it didn't happen much before... the only time i remember any significant people-i-know cameos in my dreams were during freshman year when my middle school friends started showing up in dream gyms and things. it was pretty obvious that I missed them, but it's not like I'm friends with them now. [so what was the point of this?]
who the hell writes journals after 4am? [ME]
i haven't gone swimming at all this summer. i barely went last summer too. [count: three times. once on july 4th [that was fun], twice as a workout at godawful running camp] argh i love swimming. I just wish I knew more people with pools.
there are a lot of people I wish I knew better. I guess they'll never find out though. because I'm maybe too introverted? [dumb reason.]
the thing i miss most about my old laptop are by bookmarks. i can't put them on this one [for reasons]. i miss easy access to weird various blogs about strippers and being an illustrator and feminism :<
this is a long, terrible journal.
the noonday demon is a tedious book to me.
fruits basket finished its run in the US this month. it feels like the end of an era or something because i've been reading it for 5 or 6 years. well, it did for a little while. the feeling's worn off.
i'm having trouble thinking of what to buy as a big purchase this summer. prescription aviators? teen titans the complete series on dvd? a crapload of clothes? i know i want some serenity rose merch and some derek kirk kim stuff [books]. how much are concert tickets usually? juju's finally putting out a solo album~~~ woo
thank god all the sweet 16 parties are over. and all of the cousins i'm close to are dudes so i'm safe. regular dancing sucks.
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